1. When we started our debt free journey we did have 2 separate accounts but we eventually moved to joint account for simplicity and our decision to use a debit card. It was purely for simplyfing our finances.

    We’d have been just fine I guess even with separate accounts albeit the overhead of tracking. I am with you on that I too won’t accept if someone tries to force something without understanding the why.

    I also believe the same needs to applied to other stuff Dave talks about especially investing using a Smartvestor Pro. I am a DIY investor and I don’t buy his argument on that.

    1. Something we just started doing in January was using mint to track our spending. We linked all accounts to mint so we can do a better job of tracking certain expenses. I already don’t like it much, so we’ll see if we keep doing it.

      Thanks so much for commenting. I love hearing about all of the success your family has had since becoming more involved in the personal finance community!

  2. Cool post. I am wondering if this would have been better for us in the long run.
    We had seperate accounts for about 4-6 months after we got married. Since I make most of the income and handle the finances, it was easier to combine the money. While it is nice that he trusts me to handle the finances with no issues, I am a little bothered that he doesn’t care to know much about it. We are about to start money meetings once a month and see how that goes. 🙂

    1. We struggled with the best approach when we got married as well. The most important thing is to do what is best for your family and don’t let others convince you differently. I do think it’s important for both partners to be involved in finances, so the monthly meetings sounds like a good idea. Thanks for commenting!

  3. I agree that each couple has to do what works for them, but your set-up seems a bit complex now that your wife stays home with the kids. (No judgment. Just an observation.)

    We found that a hybrid approach works best for us. We combine most of our money in our joint account and each get a couple hundred in our separate accounts as our personal spending money. All our household expenses come from the joint account, but individual fun expenses like a new purse or pair of shoes or eating out with friends or co-workers comes from our separate accounts. We originally tried the 100% joint account route and found very early on that having to account for every expense didn’t work for us, particularly when one of us didn’t see the value in what the other spent on. Having separate spending money has made things so much better.

    1. I’m really not sure how we’d do things if we started over today. This has just always worked for us. She’s always paid the “small bills” and I’ve paid the larger ones such as mortgage, day care, etc. In the end we always made sure our spending money was about the same. Similar to your approach except we just divided up the bills and paid from our individual accounts.

      Once she transitioned to staying at home it just so happened to coincide with us paying off our mortgage. So most of the money that used to go to the mortgage goes right into her account. It is a bit messy and was kind of tough to explain but it works well for us.

      Thanks for commenting!

  4. Through two long term relationships, I’ve never had a joint bank account or financial issues. You shouldn’t need a joint account for trust and planning together. So whether you want a joint account or not, it should be a personal style choice.

  5. I love your writing style!

    This has got me thinking. I guess I don’t really see how this is much different than a a joint checking account with a larger “allowance” fund? Isn’t that basically the same thing?

    I do see cons/benefits to both approaches, but this has me curious. This is a fantastic article!

    1. Thank you! And yes, it’s not much different than what you describe. Many will pay all bills out of one account then have separate accounts for spending money. That would probably be simpler, honestly. However, I wanted to share what my wife and I have done since we’ve been married (almost 9 years). It has worked for us so many others can find benefit as well.

      As always, thanks for reading!

  6. We’ve always had separate accounts and have no problem sending PayPal requests to each other. As long as you trust your partner as a responsible individual, I don’t see why this is a problem. Fewer arguments on small discretionary expenses, more quality time together. We still talk about big purchases/investments and are transparent to each other about our individual financial situations.

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